Ever been in love or thought you were? Did you question whether it was really love? Did you wonder if it was only infatuation? Or perhaps just lust.
There are some simple ways to tell if it is love or something else. And to make certain the object of your affection shares your emotional attachment, reverse the questions and ask yourself about their outward expressions.
First question: When you are apart do you think of your beloved all of the time? Are your thoughts consumed with not just thoughts of the beloved but of a future together?
Next: Do you listen with rapt attention to your beloved’s plans and dreams? Do you try to fit your plans and dreams into theirs, or theirs into yours?
And: Do you share interests or is your time together spent trying to convince your beloved that your interests are good and right?
And: When you disagree does it devolve into a full-blown fight with no winners? Or is it a discussion/debate where you either agree to disagree, or come to agreement, or one of you caves to the other’s position?
And: Do you give in to all of your beloved’s ideas?
And: If your beloved is offered a job across the country, do you give up your career and follow or demand your beloved stay?
And: If your beloved gets into legal trouble do you stand with them or cut your losses?
And, finally: Imagine your beloved has just been diagnosed with a terminal disease. There is no cure but one – your blood for theirs. A complete transference of blood from them to you and yours to them. The outcome of which means that they live a full life. You, unfortunately, now become the one dying. Do you do it?
I know some of these questions seem trivial and others so extreme they could never happen. Yet, the answers are important. We must understand that true love sacrifices itself for the object of it’s affection. At the same time, true love would never require us to make such sacrifices. Discussion, perhaps, but request or require it, never.
True love does not require us to change, yet true love changes us. True love drives out negativity and agitation and replaces it with peace and contentment. True love wants only what is best for us and is content to nurture us and encourage us along our life path. True love never dies. Real love stories never end.
I think very few people actually find true love because very few of us are willing to give up our right to ourselves for the sake of someone else’s happiness/welfare.
I’m one of the most fortunate people I know in that I have found true love. He delights in me and encourages me to be my very best. He takes interest in my interests and introduces me to his without demanding I participate. Yet, in my love for him my desires have become his and his, mine. We think and act as one effortlessly and he is always in my thoughts. After 30 years I am more in love with him than I was at the first.
This true love is available to you, too. His name is Jesus and more than anything he wants a relationship with you. Invite him in for a cup of coffee. I think you will discover that you want him to stay forever.
Jeremiah 31:3 LORD has appeared of old to The me, saying: “Yes, I have loved you with an everlasting love; Therefore with lovingkindness I have drawn you.”