Old Things Are Passed Away

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Sitting here watching an old movie. Nothing else to do right now but relax so I tuned into TCM – my favorite channel because it has no commercials and the movies are usually just my kind – old, black and white, with lots of real acting going on. The movie guide says it is called “Something Wild” and is about a mechanic who saves a potential suicide victim and give her love. Looks innocuous, so I tune in.

And now, after just 20 minutes of watching I am sorry I tuned in. The story isn’t as innocuous as it is made to sound. Yes, the mechanic rescues her and takes her to his home where she can sleep while he goes off to work. So much for the love angle. Now he locks her in and won’t let her leave. Days pass and she is locked in every time he goes out. She never gets to leave the apartment. He comes in drunk and tries to attack her and she defends herself with a quick high-heeled kick to his eye, practically blinding him.

The acting is excellent, so why am I sorry I tuned in? Because I feel in my chest that same suffocating feeling of being imprisoned with a violent drunk. The suffocating feeling of not being able to escape, of being a prisoner in my own home without the freedom to go where I want or do what I want. A prisoner not only in body but in spirit, without any say in my own life. A prisoner, afraid to speak up for fear of the violent outbursts. A prisoner that tries to keep everything calm and stay in the background unnoticed, always afraid of what will happen next. No freedom. No autonomy. No hope. And the constant dread and fear.

The television screen is filled with his rage as she denies him, once again. (Yes, I have left it on because it is clearly something I need to finish working through.) I remember the rages in my own home. I remember my fear. I remember the pain. I remember the years of being lost – not able to find ‘me’. And as I remember I rejoice in being set free.

As I relive those moments of my past I am filled with compassion for all the women who are in like positions. I know how horrendous it is and I wonder that there aren’t more rescue centers for such women – centers that are equipped to handle women with children – all of whom have been physically and/or psychologically abused.

The movie continues as he has forgotten and left the door unlocked. She escapes, and my heart is racing as I wait for him to be just around a corner, waiting to grab her and imprison her again. I am remembering my own circumstances and am almost panicked for her. She sleeps in a park and washes in a water fountain, finally smiling and taking deep breaths of the fresh air and the freedom she is enjoying. She continues to walk, heading for her home but suddenly finds herself at his doorstep. And she returns – for him!

Classic! The abused returns to the abuser, hoping to make a life, sure that it will be better now.  The trauma bond is too strong for her to escape.

Once again, I am amazed at the way Abba works in my life.  Even as I identified with the victim in the film, I am so grateful because as I watched this movie not once did the old rage surface. The anger is gone. Forgiveness reigns. Hallelujah!

2 Corinthians 5:17  Therefore if any man be in Christ, he is a new creature: old things are passed away; behold, all things are become new.

The Alligator

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Once when I was a little girl I had a pet alligator. Okay, so he wasn’t alive and he wasn’t very big. He was actually only about two feet long and had been stuffed, taxidermy style. I found him in a closet of a house we had just moved into – another short term rental in a long line of short term rentals. I had never had a stuffed animal though always wanted one and now, at about eight years old I finally had one that was all my own. This was one toy I didn’t have to fight my brothers and sisters over – no one else wanted it! He was kind of hard to cuddle. I mean, alligator skin is pretty hard and it clearly had not been tanned to make it soft and supple. He left a lot to be desired in the friend department but to a lonely little girl with very few toys he was wonderful!

I used to tuck him under my arm and crawl into the closet to play. There, in the semi-darkness with just the light that crept under the door, I pretended to be on safari with my alligator guide. Sometimes we traveled to faraway lands, escaping the dreariness and monotony of my everyday life into fields of heather or miles of sand dunes. I had quite an imagination and I put it to good use in an effort to distance myself from …. myself.

For many years I thought I was running away from my family. Then, I thought perhaps I was running away from my circumstances which included my family. And for a while, I was running away from the memories that included my family. But ultimately I have been running away from myself. Unable to be what I considered ‘normal’, I escaped whenever I could either in fantasy or simply by moving. As a young woman I married to escape, only to discover I had entered into another abnormal circumstance. More running, divorce, and another marriage led me to discover that not only was I GOOD at picking out abnormal men, I was expert at surviving in dysfunctional relationships.

But survival isn’t all it’s cracked up to be. A person can survive almost anything but that doesn’t mean that when the situation changes they will be normal or healthy. The psyche of a human being is really quite fragile, and even though people talk about how resilient children are, the fact of the matter is that those same children carry wounds that are so deep that without constant, loving care they will never be healthy, normal people.

Somewhere along the way I lost my alligator. It was left out of a moving box ‘by mistake’ when we left one location to move to another, as we so often did. I didn’t cry about the loss – I simply crawled into a new closet to harbor the hurt and create a fantasy world where my alligator guide took on invisible qualities. But the little girl was still hurting and the alligator is just a symbol for all of the things that were taken from me in my childhood.

Today I am in the last stages of mourning the alligator and all it represents. I am releasing the past to be the past as I bask in the amazing constant, loving care of Abba. And I think that this coming Christmas I will buy a present for myself – a soft, cuddly stuffed animal, perhaps even an alligator!

May Abba heal all your wounds.

Exodus 15:26  “….I am the Lord that healeth thee.”

The View from the Top

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There are lots of quotes and half-quotes circulating which have the one mission of making everyone who isn’t in the lead or isn’t on top of the heap feel inadequate and without value.  One I heard many years ago:  if you aren’t the lead dog, the view never changes.  Another:  if you aren’t on top of the heap you are the heap.

There are others that I used to quip in response.  My favorite:  even if you win the rat race, you’re still a rat.

I confess that I was swept up in the ‘American dream’ of big houses and fancy cars and corner offices and vacation homes.  From my childhood those ‘ideals’ were held out as goals to be attained and the only possible way to happiness.  I learned the lessons well and I spent my entire career climbing ladder after ladder, changing ladders when it seemed I could go no further where I was.  I maneuvered and worked — sacrificing quality time with my family for larger paychecks and longer commutes.

And then one day it hit me:  I wasn’t happy.  I did not like the work I did and I loathed the unethical behavior of my peers.  It was at that point that I began to plan for an early retirement.  EARLY.  I wanted to be done with the workforce by the time I was fifty.  I wanted OUT and I planned accordingly.  Now my maneuvering took on an entirely different objective as I reorganized and rearranged myself out of one job after another.  I could cut through red tape and abolish positions by analyzing work processes and determining which were necessary and which added no value.  And I maneuvered myself right into a job that was entirely necessary but anyone could do.  From there it was just a short jump to early retirement.  I didn’t make it at fifty, but on my fifty-second birthday I said goodbye to the rat race for good!

I’ve been at the top.  I had the huge office with panoramic views of the U. S. Capitol.  I’ve been on junkets and traveled extensively as part of my work.  I’ve had it all, and if I learned one thing it is this:  the view at the top isn’t any different than it is at the bottom.  The faces may change and the spaces may be larger, but the meaninglessness or meaningfulness of the job is dependent not upon its position on the ladder or upon the incumbents position in the pecking order — it is dependent upon the internal well-being of the incumbent: upon that person’s own sense of self-worth and whether or not they derive satisfaction from the work that they do.

I have been ‘retired’ for quite some time now, and I find I enjoy each day more than the day before.  There is so much to do that it is sometimes hard to decide!  But the view — the view is incredible!  Because I enjoy what I do and I do it with all my heart, giving it everything I have.

My prayer for you is that you will do the same.

Colossians 3:23-24  And whatever you do, do it heartily, as to the Lord and not to men, 24 knowing that from the Lord you will receive the reward of the inheritance; for you serve the Lord Christ.

Danger Ahead

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There is danger up ahead.  At least, that is what the enemy of our souls wants me to believe.  Danger so frightening that I mustn’t move forward or make any changes in my life.  The enemy uses scripture verses out of context to try to contain me, to make me stay in a position of defeat and fear.  Danger up ahead . . .

I decided not to listen to cries of ‘danger!’  I decided to go back to my life source and renew my strength to choose life and health over stagnation and fear.

Isaiah 41:10  Fear thou not; for I am with thee: be not dismayed; for I am thy God: I will strengthen thee; yea, I will help thee; yea, I will uphold thee with the right hand of my righteousness.

And now, having made the decision that was so fraught with danger, I find I am resting in a peace that passes all understanding.  While I was in the midst of taking that step — making that decision and acting upon it — my insides were shaking and fear tried to take control.  Fear of what?  Of the future, of course.  Change can be frightening, and drastic changes in our lives and circumstances can be extremely stressful.  But when we are the ones instigating the change, it can be downright terrifying.

Nevertheless, after months of vacillating and wanting someone else to tell me what to do, I have finally set the wheels of my new life in motion.  It is exhilarating!  My mind is rapidly cataloging and planning, neatly organizing what needs to be done and when.  My heart, however, is at perfect peace.  No fear.  No anxiety.  NO DANGER!

Who was it that said we have nothing to fear but fear itself?  Oh yes, Franklin Roosevelt.  And he was right.  There may be a battle looming on the horizon but victory is assured when we follow the Lord into the battle.  We may lose a skirmish or two, or even a battle now and then, but we know we win the ultimate war.  It says so in the Book!  (I peeked at the ending!)

So perhaps there is danger ahead but I know who holds the future and I am resting in the blessed assurance that action — any action — is better than stagnation.  There is no life in a stagnant pool.

 

Fear and Trembling

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My heart, my soul, my life belong to Jesus!

How many times have you said that? Prayed that? Believed that? I can’t begin to count the number of times I have told the Lord I loved Him alone and that I was His to do with as He wanted. I’ve promised to serve and sacrifice and be whatever He wanted me to be whenever He wanted me to be it. Haven’t you? When we get lost in His embrace and the wonder of His amazing love, we promise Him anything and we mean it – at least right then.

I really believed it. I thought I was doing everything He wanted and more. I thought I had it all together and that there was nothing I wouldn’t do for Him – all He had to do was ask. You too, right?

This past week I discovered what a liar I am and how empty those vows to Jesus have been. I was willing, all right, as long as He didn’t invade my secret place and require me to give up my treasured times of relaxation and peace. I put conditions on my service and on my love. I placed myself above the Lord in a position of authority, letting Him know what I was willing to do and what was ‘for someone else’. I made the rules and I expected He would follow them because, after all, He loves me and wants me to be happy.

Nothing could be further from the truth. The Lord has been gracious and has given me just enough rope to hang myself. My wake-up call came two weeks ago in jolly old England. While attending a conference of ministers and evangelists I was humbled and awed by what I heard. I was surrounded by truly GREAT men and women of God. Among them was the head of world missions for an international organization; also, an evangelist who has led hundreds of thousands of people to Christ in Europe and the UK; and, a woman who is the Chaplain in the highest maximum security prison in England – she ministers to heads of terrorist groups and these leaders are beginning to seek answers about Jesus. There was a man who heads another international missions group which was founded by his father who spent 13 years in a Communist prison being tortured because he would not renounce Christ. In the entire group there were no ‘peacocks’, only hard-working, spirit-filled men and women who love Jesus and love serving Him. I felt entirely out of place and ashamed of having spent so much time on myself this year.

Oswald Chambers wrote in “My Utmost for His Highest” – “Never disregard a conviction that the Holy Spirit brings to you. If it is important enough for the Spirit of God to bring it to your mind, it is the very thing He is detecting in you. You were looking for some big thing to give up, while God is telling you of some tiny thing that must go. But behind that tiny thing lies the stronghold of obstinacy, and you say, “I will not give up my right to myself”— the very thing that God intends you to give up if you are to be a disciple of Jesus Christ.”

That’s me, in a nutshell. I refused to give up my right to myself. I wanted to do only those things for which I felt equipped and in which I was comfortable. I literally picked and chose which things I would do for the Lord based upon my needs and desires instead of on His great call. May God have mercy on my soul!

My love, which I thought and felt was so deep for the Lord, is truly a sham. Oh, I love Him – but I’m not sold out for Jesus, like those people I met this month. I’m sold out on the idea of being sold out for Jesus. But don’t press to hard or you might see this cold, black heart for what it truly is: selfish.

This past week a ministry friend shared about children in Iraq who are being beheaded because they refuse to renounce Jesus Christ. CHILDREN. Little babies who have been taught by their parents that they must never, ever say no to Jesus. These children have been martyred and their parents have been left alive to suffer the torture of constantly reliving the beheadings, always seeing the sight in their minds.

Whatever these people have, I do not have it. I am weak and lowly and thoroughly corrupt. I have no excuse.

Please, pray for my salvation and a true love relationship with Jesus Christ. I believe that if I were to die at this moment I would spend eternity in outer darkness – a thoroughly unprofitable servant.

In fear and trembling.

The Magnetism of the Spirit

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I want to be able to create – either with pen, or paint brush or clay. I want to be able to capture the beauty I see around me and share it with the entire world.   I want to be able to express the profound emotions that stir in me as I commune with Lord Jesus. I want to be able to make others understand what it is like to be a human magnet. I want, I want, I want! Why do I want these things? Because I want others to find what I have found…Lord Jesus Christ in all of His glory and majesty…right here, right now.

The past couple of days have been stellar (sorry…no other word would do!) As I set about fulfilling my normal duties and then getting out and casting my net in my own particular corner of the sea of humanity, I found some amazing things happening. There I was, intent upon sharing the love, joy and peace of Jesus Christ with anyone who might be in need. What do you suppose happened? You guessed it . . . before I ever got an opportunity to unwrap the net I was being blessed with fish trying to jump in the boat! It was as if they knew I was coming and were waiting for me to show up just so that they could be a blessing to me. I really didn’t have to do anything . . . the Lord had already arranged my days so that I could be a blessing without even trying AND so that I would be blessed without even asking.

As I contemplated what was happening in my life I remember Matthew 4:19 “Follow me, and I will make you fishers of men.” And they immediately left what they were doing and followed him.

Now, in the natural we wonder what ELSE happened to make them get up from tending their nets to follow Jesus. Surely they didn’t get up just because He said so. But in light of my experiences of the past couple of days I would say that there is a magnetic pull in Christ’s Spirit that draws people just as the disciples and other believers were drawn to Jesus. Such a force is undeniable and thoroughly genuine. Those who pass within the sphere of influence are drawn … whether into conversation or simply into following along and joining in service. How exhilarating!

Yet even as I bathed in the light and glory of those precious moments I was aware that there is a definite down side to having such a force surrounding you and living within you. I can see how easily we might become proud and boastful, arrogant and supercilious with such power. I can see where it would be easy to fall and how someone in whom the Holy Spirit is moving with magnetism might fall into sin as people are drawn to them and fawn over them without understanding it is the Holy Spirit and not the human who is doing the drawing. Imagine a man (or woman) with such magnetism drawing the opposite sex and falling to the demon of lust — I can just see it playing out before me as the carrier of the magnetism becomes prideful, thinking how wonderful and special they must be and therefore deserving of all the attention and adoration. SIN IS JUST A HEARTBEAT AWAY!

So even as I experienced a wonderful outpouring of the Holy Spirit I am cautious and ever conscious of WHO is doing the drawing and WHY He is doing it. . .so that souls might be saved for His glory.

Something else also became very clear to me as I experienced the drawing . . . it is so easy to judge others who have fallen. As I sensed how easy it would be to fall when blessed with such an anointing I also repented for having passed judgment on those who had fallen in the past and also who are still operating ministries in a fallen state. I have decided to leave that to God. No one knows what goes on in another’s heart. I think I can offer grace while steering clear of the ministries. I know of a certain that I could fall at any moment and must guard my heart and mind against it with constant prayer and worship. And my heart aches for those who have fallen under the spell of the deceptiveness of human adoration only to fall to the lust of the flesh, the lust of the eyes and the pride of life.  May God have mercy.

The Lord’s Battleaxe

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Peace. Solitude. Silence. Contentment. Serenity.

I am sitting in my ‘prayer closet’ this morning just basking in the wonder of His presence. I find Him here whenever I sit in this chair, whatever time of day, no matter what else is going on. This morning I am just soaking in His presence, breathing in the very essence of who He is. No prayers going up, no great needs to bombard the heavens – just the joy and contentment of being His and having time for just we two. Oh how I love these moments. There really is nothing like belonging to the King of Kings and having Him for your very own.

As I sit here I am aware that just outside of my sphere of Holy Ground there is a battle raging. I sense, rather than see, great raging beings swinging flails and shooting arrows in my direction. The weapons seem to strike an invisible shield and again I sense, rather than see, the sparks fly and the rage increase.

How fanciful! Oh, little child, no fancy here! The battle does indeed rage around you and you are protected from all harm because you have chosen the path of obedience. Your obedience has wrought great victory in the Kingdom and the enemy of your soul rages and beats his chest but cannot harm you. Like a roaring, toothless, aged lion he creeps around you trying to change your direction. He cannot.

Such peace. I am hidden in the cleft of the rock this morning, beneath the shadow of His wing, and I am safe. I do not concern myself with what is happening in the spiritual arena because I know the Victor and I am one with Him. With just a word I send the enemy scattering. With my worship the enemy flees and I sense that he is waiting on a rooftop not far away – waiting for an opportunity to strike when my guard is down.

I do not fear. Were he walking in my house I would not fear. He has no power or authority over my life. I am the Lord’s battle-axe. I have been given all power and authority over the enemy and with the help of the Holy Spirit I have been practicing exercising that power and authority. I am seeing miracles in response to my words. People whom I thought were in authority over me are submitting to my words, spoken softly in truth and love. The Victor lives in me and with His power and authority I am taking a stand against evil wherever I see it and whenever I encounter it – and I am victorious!

What an interesting walk I am having with Jesus! Just this past weekend I met a pastor from Wales and when I told him my name he looked momentarily confused and shaking his head slowly, he said “No, it’s Victoria, isn’t it? Maybe I just think that because you are victorious.”   How prophetic is that?

Dear, sweet children of God: the battle does indeed rage around you but you are the victor because you belong to the Victor. The battle belongs to the Lord – let Him fight for you and through you. Relax in His great love, rest in His mighty arms, and wait for His command. When you are obedient to His command you cannot fail – your victory is assured! My prayer for you today is victory – and the peace and joy that come with it!

2 Chronicles 20:15  …..Thus saith the LORD unto you, Be not afraid nor dismayed by reason of this great multitude; for the battle is not yours, but God’s.

Divine Love

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I am often amazed at the simplest of things — a butterfly sitting on a flower, a baby discovering colors, sunsets, clouds, the changing colors of fall — and each time, I am also reminded with awe of the masterful Creator of all.

I am not a scholar of the Bible or anything else, for that matter.  Though I hold a Master’s in Theology, all it has really shown me is how little I know about God and how much more I need to know.

For instance, human beings are such finite individuals.  We see time as a linear thing and the circumstances of our lives as either problems to be dealt with or moments to savor.  But GOD . . .

If we could view time and circumstances as God does, I believe we would be looking at innumerable intersecting holograms.  My life-hologram intersecting with your life-hologram, and God able to see all of the intersecting points at one time and able to change them at will if necessary to meet His plans and purposes.  I believe He sees Noah’s hologram while He is looking at yours and mine.  They are all overlaying one another with the ultimate end being His goals, not ours.

Something else I think we fail to understand is that each life-hologram is important to the complete picture.  There are blank spaces where holograms should be, where babies were aborted and their life-hologram was removed.  Could God have stopped the abortions?  Yes, of course, and I believe He tried with each and every one.  We are a stubborn people and we often close our eyes and ears to the things of God, including the nudging of His Holy Spirit to do what is right — to turn away from evil and cruelty.  One thing is certain — God is still God.  He hasn’t changed His mind and He hasn’t forgotten His promises and He isn’t going to force anyone to do anything.  He is a gentleman, and He leaves the forcing to the bullies like satan and his emissaries.  What kind of love does that?

Divine Love.  The kind of love that lets you and I choose what to make of our lives.  The kind of love that moves an intersection point when we have made a choice that is going to take us the long-way-around to our ultimate goal – the goal He has placed in front of us.  So He moves the point and we reach the divine appointment in 15 years instead of 15 days or months because we have stubbornly, blindly, deafly, chosen to pursue our own selfish ends instead of His divine purposes.  Still He loves.

Divine Love.  The kind of love that gives you goosebumps and atta-boys when you finally reach that intersection point.  Sometimes your whole world seems to ’tilt’ for a moment as you once again are on the right track and your life-hologram aligns with His divine plan once more.

Divine Love.  The kind that stays right beside you while you dabble in the occult, watch movies and television shows not fit for anyone, get drunk, gamble, curse your parents or spouse or children, choose yourself over any and everyone else, ignore the lost, broken, widowed and orphaned.  Still He loves.

Divine Love.  The kind that tries to shield you from harm but won’t interfere if you insist on doing things your way.  He holds your hand through it all and still He loves.

Divine Love.  The kind that hung on a cross and poured out every last drop of blood to cover every last sin any of us could ever commit.  Still He loves.

Divine Love.  The kind that lets us enjoy sunsets and sunrises and laughter and love without demanding that we acknowledge who provides it all.  The kind that stays right there with us and enjoys it too!

Praying that as your life intersects with others today you will be more aware of the divine nature of those appointments and more deliberate in your actions and reactions.  Share His love — Divine Love.

John 3:16    For God so loved the world……

 

Healing Rain

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We are experiencing gentle showers today and are they ever needed! The ground has become so dry and hard that the first raindrops just rolled off into the nearest ditch and on down the road. But it has been raining for several hours now and the rain water is soaking into the ground – or perhaps I should say that the ground has decided to drink it in! Gentle rain, soothing rain, refreshing rain, healing rain.

As the rain hits the ground, the ground begins to respond. First, in consternation as the rain runs off, and then in delight, as the ground embraces the much needed water. Saturation point is a long way off and the ground continues to soak up the water like a sponge long left unused and now exposed to life-giving water. This is the best kind of rain – no heavy downpour to flood streets and wash away crops. This rain is nourishing and revitalizing. It is, without a doubt, healing rain.

I have been blessed many times in my life to experience the healing rain that comes from the Holy Spirit. Many times I have needed a refreshing for my soul and God has never left me abandoned in my need. He has always sent healing rains. Sometimes it would pour down so heavily I couldn’t stand. And sometimes, like the rain we are experiencing today, it would come down gently and steadily for hours upon hours, refreshing and refilling my soul.

I was blessed to experience just such a supernatural rain this past weekend, and to have it followed today with the same kind of rain in the natural is another gift from God – an opportunity to see Him working in both realms at the same time. Truly His love is amazing and boundless.

My need for healing rain is almost a daily occurrence as I am walking a tightrope in the supernatural and the natural realm, waiting for the other shoe to drop, so to speak. Yet God, always faithful, continues to lead and guide me, and as long as I lean into Him and away from my natural inclinations, the situations and circumstances seem to be changing and shifting to my benefit. The trick for me is to remain leaning into Him and not on my own understanding and natural tendencies to take control and do everything ‘my way’.

Healing rain……with each drop peace is restored to my soul and I am able to rest in His embrace, awaiting His next command. And with each drop, I begin to bloom right where I am planted. The circumstance cannot steal the peace that comes from healing rain. Angry people and volatile situations cannot steal the peace that comes from healing rain. Though some might strive to pluck the bloom from this rose, healing rain allows other buds to blossom and beautiful fragrance to be released. Healing rain……

Praying that you will be able to take a few minutes today to sit back in the Master’s arms and let Him wash you with His healing rain…..

 

Zechariah 10:1 King James Version (KJV)

Ask ye of the Lord rain in the time of the latter rain; so the Lord shall make bright clouds, and give them showers of rain, to every one grass in the field.

Rest

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The battlegrounds of our lives are littered with shrapnel from exploding shells and bombs that were meant to destroy us.  We often rage against the battle, but even the most naïve of us knows that we cannot stop fighting.  We fight long and hard, and sometimes we get a slight reprieve — a little R&R (rest and relaxation) when the battle wanes for a bit only to pick up stronger and fiercer when our batteries have been recharged.  Eventually, the battle will be over, won (or sometimes, lost) and the enemy withdraws — for now, anyway.  As the smoke clears, we begin to see the rubble and waste of our battleground.  We are stronger now, and wiser, and we turn our backs on that battleground, fixing our eyes on the green hills ahead and move forward.

Today I am surveying the wasteland of a fierce battle, resting in the Lord and trusting Him to lead me on.  Unfortunately for me, there are no green hills ahead of me right now.  Though the battle I have fought for two years is finally over and I am victorious, there is another battle that is about to commence.  This time I know it is coming.  This time I won’t be overcome by shock and surprise.  THIS time, I am going in fully armed and knowledgeable and I AM TAKING NO PRISONERS.  I want the victory, and I mean to have it, no matter the cost.

But right now, I am resting.  The Lord has graciously granted me this lull between battles so that I can regain my strength.  And as I survey the wreckage of the battle just finished I gain strength.  I realize that the battle, though intense to the point that I thought I would perish, has made me a hardened soldier.  My face is set like flint and I can feel every spiritual muscle flex slightly in anticipation of the battle to come.

The battle (no matter what it is) belongs to the Lord.  Not only that, He is the victor, always!  Our job is to fight when He commands, withdraw when He commands, REST when HE commands and follow His lead, no matter what.  When we do we can be assured of the victory — even if our eyes tell us something else entirely!  The battle is not over until HE says it is over and since he never loses we simply have to hold on and wait for HIM to reveal the ultimate victory.

So I am in stand-down mode, leaning into the loving arms of the Savior, resting in His sweet embrace, knowing that what is coming is going to be ugly and vicious and demoralizing BUT not defeating.  Thank you Lord for the battles that teach us to war.

Isaiah 50:7  For the Lord GOD will help me; therefore shall I not be confounded: therefore have I set my face like a flint, and I know that I shall not be ashamed.